I hope everyone is having a relatively restful start to 2023. January can be difficult for many as we face a long winter and the holidays fade. It might be a good time to check in with friends and make plans together, even if it’s just for a wintertime walk or a tea.
Over the Christmas break I spent time doing relaxing activities that I don’t normally make time for in my day-to-day life: working on a puzzle with my family, doing the big holiday Crossword in the Globe & Mail. I found that doing these activities, which busy your mind and hands, kept me in the moment and enjoying the experience. It made me realize how often I reach for my phone as the default “thing to do,” and that I no longer wanted to do that.
We’ve all been told that social media and video content on screens are addictive and not good for us. I knew this but felt like I was doing well and not feeling anxious from scrolling through Instagram. But during the quiet of the Christmas break, I realized that I was bothered by how much time I was spending on social media in my regular life. I wasn’t spending long periods of time looking at my phone, but it added up throughout the day. And I didn’t like that it was my default when I felt bored, distracted, awkward, or like I wasn’t doing anything. I decided that I wanted to be conscious about my phone and social media use.
Right around the time that I was reflecting on this topic, a new episode on the podcast “Offline with Jon Favreau” was uploaded, called “How to Avoid Distraction with Johann Hari.” Hari is a writer and journalist who has written books about drugs, mental illness and more, and recently wrote a book called “Stolen Focus: Why You Can’t Pay Attention.” He spoke with people in many fields for the book, including those working in Silicon Valley, who confirmed that their job is to make us want to open a social media app as many times as possible.
When the apps are opened and interacted with repeatedly, it is better for their company and it makes them more money. The way it makes the company more money is that when you are interacting with content, you are telling that what you like and dislike; your interests. This is valuable data when combined with your demographic information, and it is then sold. So, it is in a social media company’s best interest to make sure that the social media app is as addictive as possible. There are people who are paid to try to figure out how they can get us to use social media more. Hari also learned what we all know deep down; negative content drives up engagement, which makes it appear more often in our social media feeds.
This all sounds pretty demoralizing. Sometimes people are pretty hard on themselves about not being able to cut back on screen time or social media time. But think of it this way: these apps are designed to make your brain want to open them and refresh them and scroll. It’s not your fault and you’re not being weak-willed. You are trying to fight a tough battle.
The good news is that social media and phone habits can be changed over time with conscious choices and some help from friends and… apps. There’s an app called “Freedom,” designed to block apps and websites of your choosing in order to help you focus. There are also lock boxes with timers to put your phone in. Hari brought up an idea that I liked, which is agreeing with your friends when you get together that you’ll all put your phones away in a box or bowl somewhere. Some people say, “What if I get a phone call about an emergency?!” To which Hari responds, “You’re not Joe Biden.” People don’t need to instantly reach you 24 hours a day.
Frustratingly, sometimes we ARE expected to be available always. But that doesn’t mean we have to be. You may have heard about France introducing legislation on “the right to disconnect.” Work/life boundaries have become even more blurred during the pandemic, but France introduced this legislation back in 2017. France legally requires employers to negotiate agreements with unions for a right to disconnect from technology after working hours.
I’ve made the following choices to decrease social media and phone time: 1) When I’m waiting on someone or something in public, I don’t look at my phone. 2) I bring a book if I may need to wait on someone or something. 3) I don’t scroll on social media anymore. I open Instagram, look at the stories of my few favourite people, and close it. Or post photos, then close it. 4) I try to read while I have lunch instead of looking at my phone. 5) After watching a movie or reading, I’ve always looked at my phone to wind down before sleeping. I am fine with that, but now I don’t open social media; I look for an article or interview to read and then go to sleep afterwards. All of these make my phone and social media use much more conscious and therefore lessened. 6) I’m buying a crossword book because they’re much more fun than Instagram.
I hope thinking about this is helpful and sparks in you a desire to re-think your phone and app use, and I hope we all think about what apps and content are truly designed for before handing a child a device. There are so many other things to do. Happy new year!