Your Mom Goes to College: Part 2
— by Hillary Handy
In a previous issue, I had written about my decision to pursue further post-secondary education as a 30-something-Mom. I had grand dreams of taking you along with me and documenting my learning to share with you all. Well, time has flown and amidst my assignments, I forgot to bring you along for the ride. My apologies, gentle readers. I can’t believe it has been two semesters since then. I am proud to report I have completed my first year of a two-year program. It has been a wild journey, but I am proud of myself for persevering.
When I reflect on my experiences, I am very thankful for the opportunity to even pursue this. It truly was a family commitment to make this even possible. For my husband and family members for their willingness to change their schedules to ensure I could get out the door on time to my classes, I am eternally grateful.
This has been a season of growth and learning. I have figured out an online educational portal and recalled how to write papers and submit assignments. I have had some interesting courses, filled with content that will be useful in my future career. I have gone on field trips to the Lakehead FarmLab and the Orillia Museum of Art and History and checked out new places in our community. I was able to grow some beans and track their germination rate…didn’t see that one coming. I even was able to enjoy Reading Week and have a little vacation with my family! But there have been more life lessons learned in this season than expected. That’s part of being a life-long learner, I suppose.
- You can do hard things- I knew this would be a challenge, especially as this decision affects my whole family going to school part-time. What was most challenging was juggling all the things that come with adulting. But with a shift in priorities and a decrease in Netflix, I was able to pivot and focus on my academics while, somehow, making it all work. But sometimes, I dropped the ball, and I had to be okay with that. There’s always a cost for everything you do. I also had to practice asking for help.
- Ask for help and lean on others- As a plot twist to this story, my sister and I were able to go back to school together. This was both hilarious and comical, as we went to different schools for our undergrad. So, this was the first time we had done the same thing since high school. While humorous, it was also mutually beneficial. Being in similar seasons of life made it easier in some ways to navigate this together. We were able to find other parents who were returning back to school and develop a support network. I thought surely I would be the only one who was, say, older in their years and had children. Nope, not the case. Cheers to adult learners returning to school to pursue their new dreams. I also needed help to get to my classes. I used to be the one who got the kids to and from school. With help from my husband, my parents, my friends and babysitting neighbours, I was able to ensure my little ones were cared for when I had my classes that didn’t allow me to get them to school.
- School is more than mere academics- My initial plan with all of this was to just go in with my head down and get in, get out. I have since realized that’s not possible and as much as you want to be a lone wolf, you do need a pack. I have made some great new friends of all ages and had some fun memories and encounters. I’ve learned much more than curriculum and from an assortment of facilitators, some of whom are active community members in a variety of roles. I hope to see them in my travels once the semester is over. I have also been able to be Mom to some of my peers. In this season of their lives, they are 23 and living away from home, which I remember vividly. No matter how old you are, you always will need your mom. One classmate thanked me for being a motherly figure who helped her during a difficult time while she was away from home. Wow! Plot twist! I guess your Mom really does go to college!
- Unlearning- So much of this experience has been unlearning the things I thought I once knew. This applies to our society and the ways in which we were taught and socialized, but also the things you thought you knew about yourself. It has been beneficial to challenge my brain once more and use it in a more critical fashion while consuming new information. May we all be life-long learners, constantly evolving and (un)learning.
At any rate, this has been an interesting social experiment I’ve been conducting while attempting to earn another credential. Being a human is the most complex title I own, and being a Mom is very much a part of who I am. Student is still a title I will hold for another academic year. And then you’ll just have to see what new titles I will come up with next. Stay tuned for more adventures this fall when second year starts up. Until then, I’ll be Momming during my “summer break” and happily welcome some time off my laptop without any pending due dates!